Premier Michael Misick blames me for bankrupting the TCI?!

On Wednesday, in the midst of the most critical budget debate in the history of the Turks and Caicos Islands (TCI), Premier Hon. Dr Michael Misick took to the floor of Parliament and accused me of plotting to ruin the country. Of course, if I suffered any of the delusions and pathologies he manifests, I would be flattered.

Frankly, this is rather like a crazy man who sets his house on fire and then accuses the firemen of trying to destroy it. After all, the Premier spewed this accusation at me in response to the opposition party’s indictment against him for the mismanagement, misuse and misappropriation of government revenues that have left us effectively bankrupt.

At any rate, as evidence of my phantom plot, the Premier claimed that:

a. I received $100,000 from the previous PDM government to perform legal services but “did nothing”;

b. I am a crony being used by opposition leaders to tell lies and drag our country through the mud in the international media. (Because he won’t let me do so in the TCI); and

c. I am not even a real citizen of the TCI because I have never lived there and care nothing about it.

And, in a perverse attempt to authenticate these fatuous claims, he added that two of my erstwhile cousins (namely, Deputy Premier Floyd Hall and Minister Jeffery Hall, MP) have denied any relationship with me.

At this point, I feel obliged to apologise to my fellow TCIslanders for the mockery our Premier made of the budget debate by launching into this incomprehensible attack on me. Especially since I am reliably informed that many of you watched this farce on (his) national TV.

That said, I’m sure everyone, except the Hon. Dr Misick, is wondering what in the world I have to do with the fact that he blew our national budget by $36 million, has overdrawn the government’s current cash account by $6 million, and is planning to burden us with massive tax and fee increases to compensate for his shortcomings as Premier.

In fact, his tirade against me is such a patent and puerile ruse to deflect blame that I seriously considered not dignifying his claims with any response. Ultimately, however, my respect for the office he holds compels me to.

Therefore, in order, here is all I have to say about our Premier’s attempt to assassinate my character:

a. I never, ever, received $100,000 (or anywhere near that amount) from the PDM government.

The fact is that over a 10-year period (from 1993 to 2003), I performed a variety of legal and consulting services for the government. And I did 99 per cent of this work free of charge.

Nonetheless, in the one case where I submitted a bill for legitimate and documented services rendered, the government paid only two thirds of it and the rest remains outstanding to this day. This, no doubt, is the case the Premier was alluding to in his parliamentary diatribe.

But I am sensible enough to know that it would be unseemly and futile for me to engage in a “he said, he said” argument about the facts involved.

Therefore, I invite the Premier (or any interested party) to contact the chairman and board members of the government agency who retained me for the work in question. As I am certain that, if they tell him today what they told me back then, he will be informed that the work I submitted took one-tenth the time to complete, was twice as good, and cost half as much as similar work they were obligated to pay a foreign firm to produce.

(Incidentally, I am quite prepared to subject all of my business dealings in the TCI to the kind of forensic scrutiny that would surely cause the Premier to break out in hives if his were subjected to similar scrutiny.)

b. I challenge the Premier to cite a single lie I’ve written about him or our country. And no fair-minded person who reads my commentaries could possibly think that I’m a crony of the PDM. Which is more than can be said for the (Barbadian) editor of his state newspaper, The Sun; after all, he peddles the Premier’s propaganda as if his livelihood depended on it.

But nothing demonstrates the Premier’s delusional state of mind quite like his accusing me of ruining our country by writing about his corrupt and incompetent government in the foreign press. Because, like Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe, he takes foolish pride in the fact that he has silenced all freedom of press in the TCI.

Indeed, it takes psychotic gall for this man – who is under investigation not only for embezzling hundreds of millions of dollars but also for raping one of our tourists – to be accusing me of dragging our country through the mud. It also reflects the fact that he has become completely detached from the realities of ordinary life and politics in the TCI.

This, however, is hardly surprising since the Premier has spent more time abroad spending our money like an Arab sheik than he has at home attending the affairs of state. Furthermore, he has used public funds to maintain a lifestyle (complete with domestic servants who earn more than civil servants) that makes the $50,000 net worth he declared when he was first elected seem like mere pocket change today.

(By the way, I fear some of his ministers have become equally detached. Because only this explains why, during the budget debate, Minister Jeffrey Hall offered the following instruction to long-suffering TCIslanders as a way they can help resolve the economic crisis the government created: Begin putting things in, and taking them out, of the refrigerator in the blink of an eye to conserve electricity…)

c. Thank God my status as a bona fide TCIslander is determined only by our Constitution.

Because, if it were up to the Premier, only islanders who swear cult-like loyalty to him, Russians and Czechs who conduct shady land deals with him, and Hollywood D-listers who sponge off him would qualify.

With that, I hope my fellow TCIslanders will find my answers to the Premier’s claims both dignified and wholly credible.

Now I shall conclude by reiterating two pieces of advice I have urged the Premier to heed:

1. Two years ago, when he was teasing us with talk of independence, I advised him to govern with such prudence and honesty that no one could accuse him of being a hollow politician who is more interested in posing as an independent leader than in assuming the duties and responsibilities of good governance. Alas, he did not heed this advice…

2. Two weeks ago, when rape allegations against him first surfaced, I advised him to stay far away from the United States because he would surely be arrested. And the last thing our people need is to see another TCI leader being hauled off from Miami Airport in handcuffs. It behooves him to take heed.

NOTE: C
redible sources have reported that Bahamian Prime Minister Hubert Ingraham has joined TCI Opposition PDM Leader Hon. Floyd Seymour in calling on the Premier to resign. However, I suspect one would have better luck drawing blood from a stone.

This is why, over six months ago, I called on the more conscientious members of the ruling PNP to throw him overboard to save themselves and our country. But I fear their failure to do so will eventually force the British to dissolve this government and put our country into receivership… again.

ENDNOTE: Rumor has it that lawyers for the Premier are on the verge of concluding negotiations for him to pay off the woman who accused him of rape. If so, this will probably provide just the pretext TCI law enforcement authorities need to drop the case.

Nevertheless, he should be aware that once she reported this crime to the police in America, she retained no authority to decide whether to prosecute him. In fact, even if the Premier offers her millions, she could still be compelled to testify (and could be held in contempt if she refuses) and he could end up facing charges not only for rape but also for obstruction of justice.

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TCI Premier Michael Misick