American Idol’s presiding arbiters of mediocre talent: Randy Jackson, Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul
To date, my interest in American Idol has been limited to the entertaining antics of Judge Paula Abdul, which have included her Svengali-like use and abuse of a contestant as her Boytoy and her seemingly drug-induced ramblings that have been constant fodder for late-night comics.
But I am now prepared to concede that my dismissive attitude towards the undeniable phenomenon this show has become borders on cultural snobbery. And since it follows from my multicultural affinities that even prevailing bad taste has merit, I hereby acknowledge American Idol as the pink elephant that captivates the minds and attention of more Americans on a weekly basis than any other cultural event….
So, even though I couldn’t bring myself to vote, I watched enough of Wednesday night’s final performances to conclude that Katherine McPhee of Los Angeles should win. Alas, she did not; which only confirms that most viewers of this show lack not only cultural taste but also good judgment….
Therefore, I join all of America in congratulating the preternaturally jovial but mediocre-talented Taylor Hicks of Birmingham, Alabama as the new American Idol:
NOTE: For anyone still riveted under the illusion that American Idol is a talent competition, please consider this:
Katherine is from Los Angeles. And almost everyone in America, especially Los Angelinos, thinks that there are already too many stars living in that city. Therefore, she had to overcome a conscious bias against the stage-managed, glossy image she exhibited – having cultivated it over the years as an indispensable trait amongst her Hollywood peers.
By contrast, Taylor is from Alabama. And he exhibited a refreshing, country-bumpkin image that gave him a perennial underdog appeal. Moreover, chances are that the entire state of Alabama was involved in rigging votes for Taylor; whereas, except for her family and friends, no one in laid-back California probably bothered to work phone banks to boost votes for Katherine.
(Incidentally, Idol’s voting system gives most Southerners – who clearly have too much time on their hands – their one and only shot at sticking it to Hollywood. Therefore, it’s not surprising that country-bumpkins like Taylor do so well….)
Got it?
ENDNOTE: For a more comprehensive and relatively serious take on this show, click here to read the commentaries of my friend Professor Rachel Sullivan.
American Idol, Katherine McPhee, Taylor Hicks
Kim says
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
Anthony, I feel the same way about this show but could never express it as good as you. There is just no accounting for bad taste in this county. But you know this show has serious clout when people like Prince come on to plug their albums.
Great review!!!
Rebecca says
Ditto Kim.
I really think there’s something to the Southern country-bumpkin conspiracy. Which is why so many talented blacks from the west and north are eliminated early on.
Billy says
Sir, I’m one of those southern country-bumpkins appears you think have no culture. Fact is, you Yankees are so full of yourselves you think you shit don’t stink. Now you can count me out as a fan of your blog!!!
James says
ALH
Billy[bob] and other southern hillbillies may not appreciate your incisive and insightful wit but the rest of the world does.
You are dead right about everything in this post including your description of American Idol as the crass exploitation of mediocre talent that now passes for entertainment. It’s pathetic!
Anonymous says
C’mon man. It’s just a stupid TV show.
Anonymous says
It takes a reality TV producer from across the pond to show ‘yankees’ how dim their wit actually have become. “Idol” is not a talent show, it’s a Popularity contest. Stop crying and crawl, baby. “Gray” hair in an age of idiots wins hearts and obviously votes.
Re-review. Though your conventional wisdom is up-to-par, your social ignorance is showing.